Saturday, September 2, 2017

Saturday encore ~ Johnny's turn at bat

This encore post is from August 29, 2016. 

 I was in the sunroom, watching Johnny watching Something. 
I knew not what.

 Given Something's proximity to a swallow's nest, I figured Something to be: 
a) a rodent going after swallow eggs or
b) a snake going after the rodent going after the swallow eggs.

 Me: Get down, please, so that I might get a closer look take pictures.

 Eeewww. Eeewww. Eeewww.

 My batophobia kicked in, and
I insisted that the feral beast leave the area immediately.

 Of course he did not obey. Cats never obey...

 ...particularly cats who do not suffer from batophobia.

 So I just googled "fear of bats." It's called chiroptophobia, not batophobia,
which is stupid because I'm not afraid of chiropractors. I'm afraid of bats.

Anyway, I gave up and left the feral beast where he was, getting a stiff neck.
Oh wait. Maybe that's why it's called chiroptophobia? 
Because if you stare at a bat long enough you need a chiropractor? 

The bat remained in place and I sort of forgot about him until I went out to the barn to remove
masks and muzzles just before it got dark and sure enough, as I walked back onto the porch, 
the effing bat decided it was time to do what bats do, which is flap their leathery wings
and fly low and scare the hell out of people.

Have I mentioned I have an irrational fear of bats? 


  1. thanks for my morning laugh out loud, not that you are afraid of bats, but the story has me howling. great post. when I was a teen, we went to the drive in using my older cousins car, on the way there a bat hit the windshield lodging under the wiper blade and it was alive. we were afraid to get out of the car and he stayed there through 2 movies and we drove home with him flapping. daddy had to get the bat out..

  2. Johnny works that camera. In theory I can appreciate bats. Close encounters freak me out too.

  3. somehow i missed this post last year. Very entertaining/funny. Thanks for posting again. i got a good laugh which an article in my AARP magazine says is very important for longevity, good health, etc.

  4. I wondered if the bat would go after the swallows, but I guess they're safe. A bat caught in ones' hair, that would be awful.

  5. I think I may have chiroptophilia, but my fear of needing rabies shots is greater than my desire to get a closer look. We encourage them around here for their insect eating skills.

  6. Once upon a time I had an awful smell in my little hatchback. I searched and searched for the source for DAYS. Finally, I thought oh why not, and I looked in the hatchback part and there it was. A really dead bat. I apologized to my dog, Blueberry for thinking she had left a turd in the car. And I also marveled that since I don't roll the windows down unless I am driving, that bat had flown into my vehicle at some point and I had no clue. I do like bats, but not crazy about driving around with a dead one for a week. I have to also point out that the only time that bat could have gotten in was when Blueberry was in the vehicle with me. She rides in the backseat but she didn't let on that she knew about the stowaway.

  7. Of course I love bats! We have an exhibit at the zoo and I love it. I have had two in two houses and it was quite an experience getting them out. I have no idea how they got in.
    This was a funny post, made me smile.