Thursday, March 7, 2013

Yesterday

Hank: Everything all right, mom? You've got that look. It's not pretty.

There are certain life experiences that I find completely and utterly unbearable. I avoid them at all cost because I do not like the person I become when said experiences turn ugly, and they always do. The list isn't long, but right at the top is "dealing with satellite tv installers." Sadly, because DishTV dropped two of my favorite guilty pleasures ("Breaking Bad" and "Mad Men"), and they increased my monthly bill yet again, I had no choice but to switch providers.

So I says to the DirecTV installer yesterday, "Whatever you do, do not mess with my internet connection. Do not touch it. Do not break it. Do not breathe on it. If I lose my internet connection, the world will end, I will die, and so will you." Seriously, those were my exact words.

You know how this story ends.

Bottom line, my internet is back up and I can watch "Breaking Bad" again. That show has been very instructional with regard to the proper disposal of dead bodies. Lucky for Mr. Satellite TV Installer, yesterday's debacle did not come to that. But it was very, very close.


25 comments:

  1. LOL!

    Els (also Breaking Bad-fan)

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  2. Can completely sympathise - my husband and I both work from home and our supplier just could not understand why we were spitting feathers when they cut off our phone and broadband for 4 days!! last year.
    Re disposal of dead bodies - you live in the middle of nowhere, how hard could it be? We wouldn't tell...honest!

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  3. for the past 2 days, my internet if coming and going, because of dealing with the cable guys i am putting off calling, i shall have to watch this show in case i need to know how to dispose of dead bodies. glad you are back in business.

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  4. Estella from Co.3/7/13, 5:49 AM

    Glad to hear it all turned out fine, for the sake of the installer. Not only would you have been REALLY mad, but he would have had to deal with all of us. Sending a few more hugs.

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  5. You said it! You could have added to Mr. DirecTV, " if i lose my internet connection 479 of my blog followers WILL find you!" No pressure there. LOL

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  6. I work at home and depend on my internet for everything! I so understand the urge to throttle installers and others. Don't you have a wood chipper? Sandra: Please see the movie Fargo for detailed instructions.

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  7. hehehehe...and that's the name of that tune. I'm with you on the don't mess me around thing. Seems as though just saying what you mean is not enough now a days. You gotta "go there". Glad all turned out okay and you didn't have to go without...breaking bad etc.

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  8. I gave up TV 25 years ago and haven't watched it since. Ah sometimes when I visit friends they leave the TV blaring so I don't stay very long. In any case I have never missed it much. My computer is another story. Take it away and I would be completely lost. What did I do years ago before the internet? I guess I watched TV. Geeze!
    Glad your electronics are working famously. Your blog is important to me. Best always,

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  9. Ah, Direct TV....Second on my list of least favorite companies to deal with. Right under Wild Blue Internet.

    Has anyone but me ever wondered why companies like this give you "a deal" to sign up and service at a reasonable price for 2 years, and then they reward you for being a loyal customer by doubling the price of your service at the end of that 2 years? I never have understood that logic.

    Two days ago I was trying to watch the final installment of The Twilight Series, after having already paid for it once (my son watched it and deleted it) so I sucked it up and paid again and got 1 min into it before it froze up and would not play. I tried to rewind, tried to fast forward but instead the entire box froze up and remains that way even now. I tried to call for support, but did not have my account number. I gave them my phone number but they said they have no record of me. I gave them my name and address, but then they wanted me to verify the amount of my last bill. WHAT? (Like I ever even open that bill that comes directly out of my account) All I want you to do is fix the box at this address, not make any changes. "Well we can't do that unless we know it is really you."

    I hung up and went and read a book instead.

    Did I mention that I hate Direct TV?

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  10. Glad it worked out. Still, it's enough to want to strangle folks! Just remember not to dispose of bodies in the tub. Get a big plastic bin from Costco. The chemicals won't burn though it. :) :)

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  11. jone in AZ3/7/13, 8:31 AM

    They are like kids and dogs...They hear the only end of the Do Not sentence...(Do not) Mess with my internet. Touch it. Break it. **sigh**

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  12. Building contractors. They're on my list. Sometimes I think I could use some of that body disposal instruction, but to get it, I'd have to get the satellite TV installer to come out....

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  13. The TV guy is lucky to be alive! Remind me never to get you mad. :-}

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  14. As I learned at a school fundraising supper prior to a play performance, while sitting at the table with three other small-town (average grad class is 15) moms - the best way to dispose of a dead body is pig(s). All that is left after a day or two are the teeth. You should be all set - you have the pig, and you can glue the teeth into some open spaces in one of your skulls from the bone collection. Who needs Breaking Bad? Small town farm wives are SCARY, ha! :-) Deb

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  15. Ugh, I hate it when they mess with our connections! Last year when we moved (two doors down from our current place)Time Warner cable came to hook up the new system. The man was there for no more than 10 minutes and said that everything was set. When the movers were done and we turned everything on, NOTHING worked. When I called TWC, they told me that no one could come to look at it for 5 more days! Then my hubs called and actually got somewhere. (I guess I was too nice or something! HA!) They were there at 11:00 at night, stayed for 2 hours and redid the whole thing. I really dislike TWC and am considering switching to Direct. Bonus is that the cost is around 75.00 less per month! Even if it only lasts only two years-the savings is awesome! Glad you are up and running-we would worry about you if you weren't posting for awhile! Hugs, Meghan

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  16. Carol in N. Colorado3/7/13, 10:01 AM

    We received notice here recently that Oprah's channel would no longer be available under our package-big whoop. So I will see as soon the cost goes up. The internet is important to us as we use it for schooling. Luckily, I can have a TV antenna installed to get local channels and if I can't watch my other programs on the internet oh well. Glad you didn't have to get rid of a body. LOL I have means also but it includes a couple of hours of driving time to either bury the body or let some pigs have a meal. LOL

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  17. Cable installer guys (they've always been guys and I wouldn't want to be saying this about a female) come in all friendly. Telling the I can fix it story. In the end, it seems sort of ok. Then you try to do this or that. The phone calls start. The having to come back out to fix it. The new phone calls start. By the end, I'm trying very hard not to shake them. It can't be that hard to do it right. But, what do I know ...

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  18. I think I said words just like that to most of the trades during the past 8 months of hell... aka renovation. ... I'm still planning on hacking their bodies into manageable pieces and freezing them in garbage bags for eventual disposal... and now that we have automated garbage trucks that do it all...nobody looks into the bins....perfect.....bwahahahhha......

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  19. After years of going without cable or satellite (due to, erm, budgetary concerns), I was loathe to crawl into bed with yet another impersonal giant corporation with crappy customer service, and no way to exact revenge when necessary. Yes, it was worth going without tv to be free of Big Cable, and I am encouraging She Who Handles Utilities to go ahead and ditch them again--I can watch Downton Abbey online, thank you very much. ;)

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  20. I totally understand. It seems everyone has had a bad experience with a service person. Just for the record... I don't know anything about a dead body. :) Glad you're still Breaking Bad.

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  21. "Don't ask any questions; just help me hide the body".

    That is exactly why I am still putting up with crappy service from AT&T Internet; such a hassle to switch and something else always end up going wrong. Grrrrrrrrrrr

    Well, we are certainly glad your internet is up :-)

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  22. And I just wanna add "gross!!" about the pigs; I read about that man in Oregon a while back..... Didn't know they were carnivores nor did I know they were aggressive.... Changes my perspective on Charlotte's Web. Although we know Wynona would never have such behavior.

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  23. I don't know the tv show, but I can relate to the internet connection. Glad to hear it all turned out well.

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  24. I learn so much from this blog. Our antenna has been up there for 48 years--actually I think we replaced it once due to storm damage. Had cable one time, removed it when the local hospital paging system would interrupt the shows. Tried a second time, 20 yrs later and kicked them off the property when 1) they did not bury the cable, and 2) drilled through the house on the second floor. I did not want any holes in the siding. B*stards! Now have hole. It was a pleasure to throw them off the property.

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  25. holy bat mobile, the gang looks freaked!!! they've got your number...wow!

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