Wednesday, March 21, 2012

The unofficial census report from the middle of nowhere, New Mexico

The new phone book arrived in my mailbox last week. It's nothing to get too excited about, but I always take a minute to read through
the listings to see who came and went since the last edition. Actually, it probably took me less than a minute this time.

Here is my phone book collection from the past four years:
It seems pointless to recycle them since all together they occupy less than a quarter inch of shelf space.



The phone book I received last week is labeled 2011. We're always a little bit behind the times out here in the middle of nowhere. 

As I read through the new directory, I couldn't help but notice that it seemed more sparce than usual, so I counted the number of listings. There were 38. Then I counted the listings in the 2008 directory. There were 45. 

So according to my unofficial census, the population of the middle of nowhere, New Mexico, has dropped 15.5% in the last four years.


If this trend continues, my phone book will become a phone postcard by 2013...



...and Smooch will be crowned Queen of the Middle of Nowhere by default.

21 comments:

  1. I always get a kick out of your phone book, mainly because it's smaller then mine, which I thought was small. One advantage is that we actually have "yellow pages", but they're actually for a bigger nearby city.

    I can't believe your population is dwindling! Why would anyone want to leave such a beautiful place?

    As for Smooch, she'll always be #1, top dog, queen of nowhere. She's one special pup!

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  2. Smooch is already the queen whether or not the rest of the middle of nowhere knows it.

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  3. Armie Hammer was on Ellen Degeneres' show yesterday. Apparently he is filming the new Lone Ranger movie. He said they were filming "in the middle of nowhere New Mexico." All I could think was "I wonder if the 7MSN herd had cameos."

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  4. Smooch looks regal on blue cushions! Too bad the lottery isn't a local thing. You'd be a cinch to win.

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  5. It's nice having a few neighbors... as long as they are TOO close. Go Smooch, win that crown and a doggie biscuit scepter.

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  6. I'll trade phonebooks with you! Ours is up to 25,000 something...I prefer the wide, open spaces!

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  7. Wow. I wonder if those folks had to move to a more remote spot? :D

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  8. Its a dogs life out there eh!;-)

    Trade ya for the phone book the was left on my door step on monday past...when the delivery person plopped it down on my front step it shook the whole house eh ;D

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  9. Ah, but they haven't taken into account the donkeys, pigeons, porcupines and mice that have moved in! If they did, you'd suddenly find yourself in a population boom.

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  10. I'm not sure what's funnier, how small the "book" is or the fact that it is labeled 2011? LOL

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  11. I'll bet the population isn't dwindling; I'll bet people are getting rid of their landlines as cell service improves.
    Also, I hope you WILL keep the directories for years to come. I can remember my paternal grandmother's number, 506, but cannot remember my maternal grandparents' number (there was one house in between my grandparents, and for some reason, Ma and Pa had four numbers and Granny only had the three!) I would love to see an old phone book from Hot Springs VA, where they lived, so I could read the names of the people who have been gone so long.

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  12. May I suggest that the next phone book include all the animals that live out in the Middle of Nowhere - that would at least quadruple the phone book and provide a much more accurate census of the population there. Just adding your critters alone would add a page. Besides, I can't wait to call up Alan or George and get a big "He-Haw".

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  13. Estella from Co.3/21/12, 7:29 AM

    NOW THAT'S the size phone book I like. As for Smooch, she doesn't need a default, she IS a Queen. Love the last picture. Hugs

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  14. Anne, I don't think folks out here are getting rid of their landlines. Cell phone service in the middle of nowhere is still hit or miss, mostly miss.

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  15. Love this post!! Thanks for putting a smile on my face this morning! Everyone else in the office is grumpy today. :( I wish my phone book was that small.

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  16. ...and Smooch is the most beautiful queen...of anywhere!

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  17. Thinking back about pictures of Smooch, I think of her perched on the window seat, on a cushion chair on the porch, in the truck passenger seat, on the bed and now on queenly pillows. I don't remember seeing her on the embroidered doggy bed I remember you ordering for her one Christmas. Does she prefer "people" spots to her own?

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  18. Now that is one beautiful dog! She is already queen of all she surveys and then some.

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  19. Oh my.... and I thought our phone book was small when we moved to SC in 1974. Our's was also 5 1/2" by 8 1/2" but our town was huge in comparison; I think the phone book was about 1/4" thick! We could reach anyone by dialing only the last 4 numbers!

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  20. That last photo reminds me of a very young Queen Elizabeth ... quiet, serene, contemplative, poised ... I think Her Royal Doggy Highness Smooch already got the noblesse oblige thang goin' on!

    — Bonz

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